No Tchotchkes for Tanta Trudy by Paul Beckman
Dear Family,
As of this date I would like you all to begin referring to our mother as Tanta Trudy instead of Aunt Trudy, Trudy, or hey Trude. Since the passing of Tanta Yetta earlier this year our family has been without a Tanta. Tanta—a word that connotes the first among equals and shows wisdom, generosity, and commands respect for her place in the family. Since my mother is now the eldest daughter of all her sisters the mantle rightfully falls on her shoulders and who better to take up this position?
Having spoken to several of you, I know that you agree it’s time to make it official. Understand now, my siblings and I do not expect her sisters or brothers to call her Tanta, but it would be only right to use the term when speaking of her, as has been the case with the late New York Tantas—Rhea, Pearl, and Bessie.
We, my brother, sister, and I, want you to know we mean no disrespect to any of our other loving aunts, but this family has been too long without a Tanta and Tanta Trudy has agreed to step up to the plate and fill this void.
In the spirit of family unity that our family is known for there will be a Welcome Tanta Trudy picnic at one of the cousin’s houses. I’ll let you know which cousin in my next letter, but it will be this coming Labor Day, so save the date.
As you are all aware, it is only proper to welcome in a new Tanta with a gift, so instead of each of you bringing a tchotchke that Tanta Trudy will have to dust, we have decided that a new 70 inch curved screen, smart television with surround sound would be the perfect gift.
Please send your donations to me as soon as possible so we can surprise Tanta Trudy before her party. If there is any money left over we will use it to buy Tanta Trudy a new comfortable lounger to use in front of her new TV.
Sincerely,
Cousin Marvin and Siblings
Paul Beckman’s flash collection, Kiss Kiss (Truth Serum Press) was a finalist for the 2019/2020 Indie Book Awards. Some of his stories appeared in Spelk, Connotation Press, Necessary Fiction, Litro, Pank, Playboy, WINK, Jellyfish Review, and The Lost Balloon.
Watch and listen to Paul Beckman read CodeCode My World on our Flash A / V page.
Photo credit-Hank Paper
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