Competition Twenty-Three Shortlisted: Unspoken Epilogue by Kate Diamond
When I notice that the beeping and clattering has stopped it is with a benign acceptance, rather than any sadness. The emotions must work differently here, because my cheeks are dry – a unique position for someone known to cry at adverts.
‘Ah yes’, I think, with my new detached reverence, ‘here comes the flashing before my eyes section’. I settle back for the obvious: weddings, babies, graduations, that expensive holiday, that exciting job offer.
Instead the curated collection is quiet simplicity: holding hands and skipping in the park, laughing so hard it turned to tears, blankets on the sofa, wind at the top of a big hill, bare feet in the sea, jam sandwiches thick with butter. There is no music to this montage. Instead, bubbling background noise. Overlapping snippets of conversations, the cadence of my grandchildren’s laughter, the words ‘I love you’ uttered by countless voices, bouncing back and forth in an endless echo.
Gradually, calmly, I become aware of the wooden box surrounding me. This prospect would be too much for the old me, who avoided enclosed spaces at all costs. But as I reach out to touch them I realise the walls of the box are not made from wood, but from the words of the celebrant, from the tears of my family and friends, from the stories and memories spoken out loud and held in hearts.
Several people place their hand on the wooden box as they leave, trying to send their love down to me even though I am no longer there. I wish I could tell them that I feel it.
I wish I could tell them what comes next.
Kate recently embarked on a creative writing course after years spent squirrelling away ideas and telling people she was going to write a book one day. By day she works in a library. By night she sits on the sofa and attempts to write stories. Both make her incredibly happy.
Photo by Dan Meyers on Unsplash
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